Millie has had lots of lap time in the last couple days because I've been working quite a bit on the computer. Three weeks ago I had the desktop updated with Windows 7 and additional memory, and I have been asking myself why I didn't do it sooner. I can actually count on the computer to work ~ what a novel idea! I had two years of emails to go through, and it has been a pleasure instead of a chore to move back and forth among accounts and documents. I can access websites and leave windows open. I realized this morning how easy it is to use the computer now.
After my massage on Thursday, my therapist advised me to get off the table with ease, to be aware of how I was moving. I did and I have tried to carry that ease with me. For six months I've been working to breathe easier, and finally it feels like I can for more than a few hours at a time. I asked my daughter why it has taken so long; she said it's like blowing up a balloon, where we blow and blow and it seems like nothing is happening...then we begin to see progress. Slowly and steadily I have been working to open, to breathe, to feel ease. It is happening slowly. My hope is that the gradual changes will stay with me.
While sorting through emails I found a quote sent by a friend last September. It speaks beautifully to what I am learning to do ~
"Be patient with all that is unresolved in your heart, and try to love the questions themselves. Do not seek for the answers that cannot be given, for you wouldn't be able to live with them, and the point is to live everything. Live the questions now, and perhaps without knowing it, you will live along someday into the answers."
--Rainer Maria Rilke
7 comments:
Millie is gorgeous!! *sigh*
I'm glad to hear you're feeling better. Continue to be gentle with yourself. Baby steps.
Millie is adorable...and sitting on your lap while you work..that's trust.
Jen
Thank you for your early morning email. Checked computer before heading for errands. Grocery and liscense renewal. Eyes doing fine and healing, so thankful. Sight seems slightly improved when I read :)
Love the quote
speaks volumes to me.
Have a good day and thank you for your online friendship...
Your scenes of Millie have won my heart, completely. And the Rilke -- I quoted it last month to someone about something. The words and meaning are not particular, but make such mysterious sense -- in general.
Sharon, I love Millie! It's wonderful that you found each other. And I'm not sure which version of Windows I have, but yours sounds much easier than mine. My documents in Word are such a mess. Maybe I need to install the new system.
I love Millie, too ... and love the Rilke quote you posted at the end. In fact, I've had a rotten day dealing with the nursing home and "Mama Drama" today, while struggling with my own surgical healing. That Rilke quote was just what I needed, my friend ... thank you!
Your daughter is smart. Loved the balloon analogy.
Also appreciate the Rilke quote. Patience and Trust. Trust and Patience.
Celebrating your ease with you.
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