Dancing Around The Edges

Summer. Finally. In the past few weeks we have had a number of days with temperatures that qualify for summer-like. We have even experienced some humidity. I have lived in Maine long enough to know that this progression of days that combine heat and humidity mean that it is summer, and I need to appreciate it while it lasts.

In the past week we have also had mornings that started in the 50-degree range. That spells f-a-l-l to me. This far north there is a blurring of the lines between seasons.

Friday was Ken's second day of work. It was a day with more physical demands and longer hours. He did well. He packed a lunch and snacks so he would have something to eat throughout the day in an attempt to keep up his energy level. He was tired but he looked good when he got home.

Today was much the same. He said he's feeling stronger every day.

Our youngest son was home for the week-end. We roasted hot dogs over a campfire together Saturday night, with a couple of his friends, and we had blueberry pancakes together Sunday morning. His visits pass quickly and we don't see much of him, but we are always glad when he comes home.

As for me, I am back in the routine that has developed over time. Life fills in where there is space available. I never lack for things to do.

The thing is...I have put off doing some of the things I most want to do. I tell myself that there are other things that need to be done first, chores that demand my attention and projects that should be finished.

I am dancing around the edges. I am putting off getting to the good stuff.

I am pondering why. I think it has to do with feeling sure that the perfect job will soon present itself. In the meantime, what does it mean if I throw myself into this life that is what my life is now?

Is that giving up?

Or is that what it means to surrender?