Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Searching

Dream job: Employed to organize books for people all over the country.

Absent that possibility, I need to figure out what I want to do with my life. Yesterday I met with a woman who gave me that assignment, sort of. First, we went over my resume. She gave me advice about how to rework the sections and content. That is my homework for our next meeting on Monday. I also have the assignment to look back over my life at the themes that run through my schooling and worklife to figure out what I'm good at and what I really want to do. She said we will look at the process on two tracks: one to find a job, and one to find out what I really want to do. A friend went with me, and on Friday she and I are getting together with someone to learn a bit about web design, a desirable skill in the current market.

I had spent the previous two days wondering what to do next and who to ask for help. It looks like the cavalry has arrived.

Last night I went to a town meeting to talk about the issue of cable, or lack of for so many of us. A representative from the cable company was there to answer questions, and there were many from the 65 townspeople present. It all comes down to profit as far as the company is concerned. There is no physical reason why cable cannot be provided for every house in the town, regardless of how rural the location. Dollar amounts were quoted by the company, and they were refuted by people who have gotten much lower estimates of the cost to run cable to their homes. I had a few questions, and at the end of the evening I publicly thanked the representative for being there, being civil, and respecting our position. There is work to be done and a cable advisory committee will be created to do just that. I signed up for the committee, and after the meeting I had a chance to meet neighbors who are also concerned about the issue. A few asked me if I planned to join the committee because they thought I'd do a good job articulating our concerns. That felt good.

When I got home I called my mom to talk about things that have been weighing heavily on my mind. We talked for over an hour, which is unusual for us, and we both felt better.

Then I checked to see what was new in the blogosphere. For Shelter, the World wrote a post where she quoted Women Who Run With the Wolves. I pulled my copy of the old favorite off the shelf and randomly opened it to page 317 to the perfect paragraph:

"If you're scared, scared to fail, I say begin already, fail if you must, pick yourself up, start again. If you fail again, you fail. So what? Begin again. It is not the failure that holds us back but the reluctance to begin over again that causes us to stagnate. If you're scared, so what? If you're afraid something's going to leap out and bite you, then for heaven's sake, get it over with already. Let your fear leap out and bite you so you can get it over with and go on. You'll get over it. The fear will pass.... "

The idea is to get over the fear so a woman can go on to do what she's meant to do with her life. It's time for me to get over the fear.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

So much rich material in this post, Sharon! I admire how you are assessing your skills and looking at the things you love and how you can apply that material to your job search. And Women Who Run With The Wolves! That book was the beginning of an inner search for me, and I know it's been an inspiration to many women. I don't know if I still have my copy, but you've sent me on a search. I do believe in "book angels" -- the spirits that lead us to exactly the right book, the right page, at the time we need it!

Anonymous said...

Sounds like you might want to consider local politics there Sharon! Great organizing skills. This woman helping you sounds fantastic and that is very exciting! Perhaps an inspirational speaker?

CaShThoMa said...

Nice analysis, Sharon.
None of us should be afraid to fail, but we are. I think that fear paralyzes so many of us. When you figure out how to get over that hurdle, let me know; it would probably help me figure out what I want to do with the rest of my life, too!

Anonymous said...

Sharon, I love your post. Your support group and the feedback you're getting are important. I was wondering: Have you ever taken a Myer-Briggs personality profile? There are some online that you can take for free, or sometimes you can find a more official source to administer a longer version of the test.

Anonymous said...

Very timely post for me. Thank you.